I'm tired kittens. Super deep down weary. Between the two non-profits I intern with I've been so busy the last few weeks, but it's a constant busy, the kind of busy that is naturally fuzzy and without borders due to working weekend shifts at info booths, or answering e-mails at 11 p.m., or reading scholarly journals on Sundays at 10 a.m., or getting random assignments and making day before the event commitments to work.
I'm loving all of it, but I also love schedules, and order, and it's hard to come by when one is working for two different organizations. The people I work for are amazing, I believe in what they do, it's the direction I'd like my career to go in, but I definitely need to find a way to "clock out", as it were. I always say "I'm just going to check my e-mail twice a day, morning and night" and instead I check it about once an hour for one organization, while I'm on the computer researching for the other. It creates this feeling of constantly working. And while I love to work, I also like downtime.
Maybe I can get better about self-organization. I was always really good about motivating myself to create and stick to study schedules while I was working and going to school, both full time, so I just need to do the same for my interning. I am so happy I get to do the work that I'm doing, and I'm grateful for everything I'm learning, I just need to balance it a bit.
I've always been at my best when I'm at my busiest, but it was usually a healthy mix of school, work, volunteering, socializing, and working out. Now it's just a bit too skewed towards work (which is, of course, volunteering), and all the other pieces are getting edged out. Plus, because I was a Democratic Precinct chair in Dallas, and an Obama Precinct Captain, and a delegate to the Democratic State Convention, I've been getting tons of e-mails about helping out here in Colorado, and I really want to. But right now I'm so all over the place, lacking a set schedule, it's hard to add that to the mix.
That's my goal for October. Balance. It's not a matter of too much work- I've been far busier many times in my life and was pretty stress free- it's just a matter of corralling it. How very Texas of me to use such a metaphor, right?