Show Me the Country

I haven't been feeling very chatty lately, in terms of blog posting. Mostly because so much of what I'm feeling lately is anger, revolving around the debate about spending and the solutions to our problem. So many things are being said that appall me, that make me ashamed, that frustrate me, that make me want to scream I'm so angry. I'd rather not drag it all out here on my blog, but I think it's gotten to the point where I'm just going to throw it all out there, because it's making me nuts.

First of all, I'm incredibly saddened that many people want to go so far as to get rid of public schools in the interest of a small government so that we'll have "more liberty". I suppose I'm starting to realize that utopia for a lot of people for some reason strongly resembles an unstable country in Africa. No social safety nets, no welfare of any kind, no public schools, very low taxes, and a government with little power that stays out of the citizen's business. I wonder if they consider that all of those things usually come with civil unrest, hordes of poor, desperate people, and the "luxury" of living in a walled compound with security guards to protect you if you happen to somehow find a way to be rich? Probably not.

I'm sure that getting rid of public schools, eliminating all social safety nets, lowering taxes further, and eliminating Medicare and SS for the elderly are exactly what will "make our nation great" again. I'm wondering how awesome they think being rich will be if every time you leave your walled compound you're greeted with shanty towns, squalor, and a teeming mass of desperate poor people who might, at any moment, turn on your ass and storm the compound for some food and money. Or, how great of a business they'll be able to build without having access to an educated workforce. These people need to travel more. Or, I don't know, read a book. Hell, they could even read a history book of their own country and see how awesome it really was for people before America instituted safety nets. Just go back and study the Great Depression/Dust Bowl. Trust me, not ONE of those small government/get rid of public schools/abolish all government aid people would be saying "Oh, no, it's fine, Government, please don't help me! I shall starve to death in the streets, because I am so committed to my political ideology of small government". Yeah. Right.

More than anything, I'd LOVE it if anyone arguing that the way to make America great is to get rid of all social safety nets, public schools, and Medicare/SS could give me just ONE example- JUST ONE- of a modern country that has 0 social safety nets and no public school and also has a healthy, vibrant economy, that is a global player in international economics, that has a stable society with a respected currency, and that has created a political and economic culture that allows people like Bill Gates and Warren Buffet to be successful. Just one. There are almost 200 countries in this world of ours, I would think that if the Ayn Rand based fantasies of a perfect country with 0 safety nets and a simultaneously thriving economy and stable society were possible in reality, at least one of those almost 200 countries would bear testimony to it. 'Cause I gotta be honest, ya'll, when I look at the countries that have 0 social safety nets, and no public school, and no Plan B for those who fall on hard times or are unfortunate enough to be born into them... well, those aren't the kind of places that I see anyone lining up to move to, or invest in, or start a business in, either. Those are usually the places people want to leave behind, places full of civil unrest and starvation and huge divides between the wealthy in walled compounds and the poor living in the streets or in shanty towns, or herded into refugee camps because their government isn't strong enough to protect them from roving bands of killers and rapists who are trying to wipe them out on a whim. But ok, sure, if that's the plan for making America great- just give me one example of it working out. I'm a facts and figures kinda gal, so I'll be waiting. I've posed this question several times over the last few weeks, and no one has given me one example. Because in my studies, all the countries that meet these Ayn Rand fueled fantasies are in shambles.

So, here's what I'm thinking- I'm thinking it's because that country simply doesn't exist. I'm thinking it's because people realize that everyone benefits by investing back in our society, by educating children, by having social safety nets so that when things get tough we don't have masses of hungry, desperate people roaming the streets, willing to take a chance with jail time if it means a bit of cash and some food. Here's a mental exercise- tell me, how awesome do you think our crime rate would be if, during these last several years of epic unemployment, we had no unemployment benefits, no food stamps, no TANF, no housing subsidies, etc. Think about that. Where would those people have gone? What would they have done? Just curled up and politely starved, homeless, in an out of the way corner of society? I'm thinking not. Trust me, I'd rather pay my money in taxes and invest it in our society than take my chances on the streets with double digit unemployment creating a substantial number of stressed out, hopeless people with no light at the end of the tunnel. Desperation is not the predominant emotion I want a significant sector of our society to have.

While we're on the subject of paying now or paying later, and how I'd like to pay- I'd rather pay out some welfare, or pay more into schools, or give unemployment benefits, or give job training than pay for more police on the street to quell riots, or pay upwards of $30K a year to house and feed someone for several years in prison. So there's that, too. Pro-active is my mantra, not reactive. Especially because reactive usually costs way more than just helping out in the first damned place. And we usually all benefit from proactive, while reactive doesn't serve to accomplish anything more than a hasty tit for tat.


Oh, but wait, back to my question- show me that country. This idyllic bastion of liberty where the government stays the hell out, doesn't meddle with things like educating all children, or regulating our food and drugs, and lets people get sick and die if they commit the infraction of losing a job, or being born poor, or falling ill. And if that country is so damned great, why isn't it an international player? Why haven't I heard of this utopia of liberty? And if such a country exists, why aren't all the people who want to model America after it calling it out by name and location, and pointing excitedly to its success to bolster their argument?


All cards on the table- I'm a product of welfare. There you go. Despite two working parents, we qualified for every damn one of those "shameful" entitlement programs. And I worked, too, from 14 on, and then full time all through college while studying full time to keep my sholarship- and guess what? I still needed Pell Grants to get through. Yes, that's right, free money that I "didn't deserve". I shudder to think how my potential would have been utterly wasted if there were 0 social safety nets. I am of far greater benefit to my country as an educated person than I would have been if I was tossed by the wayside due to the circumstance of birth. And I have far more pride in my country when it chooses to be compassionate and considerate of the hard blows people receive in this life than when it tries to play detached, strategic economist with flesh and blood living beings. Especially when the predominant evidence for the validity of such a strategy hinges on a theoretical country that doesn't even exist in this world.

Creepsauce Casserole, or, Kidnapping is For Your Own Good, Sinner

So, apparently this guy** thought it would be a cool idea to make a pro-life movie that alludes to the "Saw" movies. I know, stay with me. Basically three women are kidnapped from an abortion clinic and held hostage until they give birth. Wanna see the trailer? Ok!



I wonder how it ends? Maybe they go for a gritty, realistic ending. Like, totally real life stuff. One where as soon as the baby is born the mother is ditched by our society, and is then vilified as a worthless leech on our tax system by getting on Medicaid and taking welfare to support her child? Or do these kidnappers pay for diapers and food and medical bills and a safe place to live for the children they saved? Ah, so many questions with this one.

As my friend said, I guess "kidnapping women and forcing them to give birth against their wills is a "pro-life" value worth making a movie about!". Indeed. Very strange way of going about advocating one's position. It's so over the top that it would never sway anyone. This seems to be one of those "preaching to the choir" kind of "YEAH! That's RIGHT! We're RIGHT!" kind of movies to fire up an already devoted base. For the record, such movies annoy me whatever the political slant may be.

Also, for the record, this isn't meant to open up a huge can o' worms over the thorny issue of abortion. I would hope anyone, on either side, would think that this movie is a stinker.

**Of course, per the article I linked above, this guy also made a movie "called O.B.A.M. Nude, in which a college student addicted to cocaine sells his soul to the devil to become a socialist leader. "Satan tutors him on political points," Del Vecchio said. "So he can trick the masses by a mantra of hope and change." Wink."

Well, That Was 4 Weeks of Wasted Time....

This afternoon I took the PLACE English exam for teacher certification in Colorado. As I mentioned previously, I was stoked to get a study guide via the inter-library loan system and I was confident in my baseline knowledge of the subject matter. I studied for about 5 weeks, although the first week was just reviewing and figuring out a plan of attack for studying, so basically 4 full weeks of studying took place. By yesterday I had read the book cover to cover four times, researched online for practice tests, made study guides, and pretty much memorized a 6 page foldout by SparkNotes on Literature (terms, periods, literary criticism, etc.). After all was said and done, I had pretty much memorized the book and every date, literary period, influential author, and grammar rule under the sun (most I already knew, but it was all a great review).

I was confident going into the test this afternoon. By 5 questions in, I was pretty certain I had no idea if I was going to pass it or fail it. I've taken a LOT of standardized tests in my day. And I can safely say that the PLACE English exam is the most poorly written one I have ever had the dubious "opportunity" to try and decipher. The questions were badly worded and ambiguous, the answers were subjective and seemingly unrelated to the questions...I would have laughed out loud if it wasn't so damned frustrating. On top of the terrible test format, guess what? Oh, nothing I studied in the PLACE study guide was actually, you know, on the test, with the exception of giving speeches. Related to that, strangely fully half of the test was over advertising and the media, and giving and writing speeches. Only about 5 questions were about grammar and punctuation. Some of the questions were almost suspiciously subjective, with very clear morals and values being promoted or denigrated....overall, it was the worst testing experience I have ever had, hands down, in my entire life. I'm good at taking standardized tests, I know how to work them- I made a 29 on my ACT, a 1450 on my PSAT, and a 1370 on my SAT. I say that not to brag, but to reinforce that this is not just that I'm a poor test taker, but that the test was a glaring anomaly in my long history, from high school through grad school, of generally kicking ass at tests. I have truly no idea if I aced it or failed miserably. I have never had such a confusing, frustrating experience with a test. There have been times when I have known I gave the wrong answer, but fully a third of the questions were so subjective and strange that I couldn't even place bets as to whether or not I answered them correctly. I felt like there was some sort of general philosophy, or ideology, that I was being tested on, that I was unaware I would be tested on until I got into the exam room. 


I got home and googled around a bit, and it seems that many people have had the same experience. All I know is that I literally wasted 4 weeks of studying, because none of it prepared me for what I had to wade through and interpret today. I want to reiterate that the questions were NOT hard- it wasn't a matter of a question referencing a specific literary period and asking me to identify an author from it, or asking for the definition of a term that I simply didn't know- the questions were flat out obtuse and nonsensical. I had to make conjectures as to what the question was asking, and then I had further theorize as to what rambling, pointlessly detailed answer was the most relevant to the question. 


I truly have no idea how that test is any kind of reliably predictive indicator of who will make an effective teacher. I get my results in April, and if I fail it I will be equal parts pissed off and embarrassed. I'll also be annoyed because I'll have to take two summer school classes so that I can meet the college credit requirement, so June will be spent taking two intensive classes, 6 days a week, from 8 a.m. to 3 p.m. for a month. 


I really, really hope I passed.

Is it Really that Hard?

You know, I can kind of understand the spread of half truths, and blatant lies, back in the day before widespread access to the internet. But nowadays, when one can google something and find at least 10 different articles in 5 seconds on one subject from all over the world, from reputable news sources, why do people still just take whatever their favorite radio/TV personality says at face value?

This happened to me a lot during the election, when I would get daily e-mail forwards about some ridiculous story that was patently deceitful and/or made up. It happens especially often on Facebook, and it gets annoying. Lots of my friends on all different sides of the political game comment on things, or post status updates, or provide links that are completely, utterly false, or if not false, they are lying by omission by leaving huge pertinent chunks of the real story out. This isn't just "hey, this is my opinion" or "the way I see it..". No, there is actually a real, truthful story out there in the world, that has been thoroughly reported on by real news agencies, and yet whatever Alex Jones or Rush Limbaugh or Keith Olbermann says about it is somehow the sanctified truth. Those people are very passionate about what they believe in, and way to go First Amendment so they can say whatever they want, but they are ENTERTAINERS. And they are marketing their programs to a specific, targeted demographic. They're going to twist whatever they have to so that their listeners feel patted on the head and justified in thinking about things the way they do.

Folks, fact of the matter is it takes 5 seconds of your life to do a tiny bit of research. Do it. Google that offensive half-of-a-quote, and ta-da! Look at what a big boy or girl you are!! You just found the ENTIRE QUOTE, plus the context in which it was spoken! Aww, how sweet! Look at who found the whole story! Who's a good little media consumer? YOU ARE! You get a gold star.

Seriously. If you are on the internet enough to play Farmville and Mafia Wars, take a little bit of your time to do some pathetically easy research on a topic before you splash it all over Facebook or e-mail it to everyone you know. Because it's just embarrassing when you don't.

Etsy Confuses Me Deep Down in My Soul

One of my friends from college, a super talented boy, works for Etsy. And I have a few friends who make beautiful, intricate, unique crafts, and most of them have Etsy shops that I hope are doing well...

But...

Can I just say that I'm a *weensy* baby bit confused by how prolific the possession of an Etsy shop is? Because, a lot of times it's not to sell reasonably priced crafts of the caliber I've referenced above, but to sell...kind of lame-o stuff that I could make in about 30 minutes by sewing/gluing together a grand total of two pre-made items purchased from Hobby Lobby. And a lot of it is the same stuff, over and over and over again, the only difference is that different people are making it.

I know, I know, art is relative, yadda yadda yadda. But it's kind of silly to me to charge (sometimes a lot of) money to sell things on Etsy that you didn't, actually, truly, *make*, when so many other people are hardcore awesome at their respective crafts. I mean, sure, maybe you put it together, but just because I can put together a bike from Wal-Mart doesn't really mean I should then call myself a bike maker and try and sell it for triple digits... especially if every. other. chick. on. the. block. is *also* buying bikes from Wal-Mart, putting them together, calling themselves bike makers, and then trying to sell them for triple digits...

So, I'm feeling the way I described in this post title. I love handmade, homemade, crafty little things made by creative people, and a ton of the stuff on Etsy blows me away. But some of the stuff on Etsy makes me shake my head and furrow my brow in confusion, often followed quickly by shock at how expensive said "craft" is, and then I think "well, I gotta hand it to 'em, they have a lot of gumption to put this out there and then unflinchingly charge THAT MUCH for it..."

Maybe I just don't get it, but sewing a few buttons on a onesie purchased in a 3 pack from Target, or stitching a pre-made flower to a piece of elastic, or wrapping ribbon around a pre-made box just don't meet my expectations of things that should cost more than $30. *Shrugs* I guess I'm weird like that.

Tare It Up

So, I've been thinking about ways to reduce my trash and plastic consumption. Sure, I try to recycle, but wouldn't it be better to just not use it in the first place?

I found a few blogs dedicated to these endeavors, and over and again they mentioned taking glass containers to grocery stores to buy bulk items. I adore Sprouts with pretty much everything in my grocery shopping parts, so yesterday, when picking up the fixings for a new recipe, I asked if I could bring my glass container in to partake of the 4 aisles of bulk goodness they got goin' on.

To which the cashier replied,

"Sure, but we don't tare the container, so it's included in the weight of what you're buying".

What the hell? I'm just trying to be a good consumer, avoid my plastic consumption, and get my bulk buy on. And you tell me I'll essentially be charged, basically fiscally punished, as a result? How hard is it to tare my container Sprouts? Seriously.

So, here's the deal, Sprouts, we've had a good run, and you're way more laid back and easy to hang out with than your uptight sister Whole Foods, and certainly a cheaper date, but I think this is one issue where you just don't do it for me. I won't talk about getting my bulk on at Whole Foods as long as you don't get all pissy when I don't visit your barrels anymore, deal? Deal.

I Got 99 Problems and They're All My Teeth

So, in preparation for the big move I hit up my gyno and a dentist to get checked from head to toe while I still had insurance. I went to the gyno for a full inspection, I peed in a cup, they drew my blood, and then refilled my Retin-A and birth control. I'm perfectly healthy and I now have my prescriptions for the next year. The next and final stop was a dentist. Now, I had 4 cavities filled and 6 sealed back in July, and ever since then I have religiously flossed TWICE daily, so this was more of a "I need to get my teeth cleaned" kind of thing. So, I just went to the place down the street from me, the guy that cleaned Puppy Bob's teeth. Nice dentist, nice office, nice dental assistants.

So, I go in for a teeth cleaning, smugly expecting congratulations on my perfectly flossed awesome teeth... and instead I'm told I have EIGHT cavities. WHAT. THE. HELL. He tells me they were probably already starting last July, after I tell him I've lost all faith in flossing upon hearing that with the exception of one they are all in between my teeth. Anyway, he says "we can do it all today" so my tooth cleaning turns into a 3 hour marathon of dentistry. I leave, go home, and sleep all day.

That was over two weeks ago, and my teeth have been killing me. Bringing me to tears when I eat. Feeling like I'm chewing cold rocks when I'm eating room temperature soft bread. It was awful. I went back in last Wednesday to have my bite adjusted- aka to have my fillings sanded down- but this last weekend two separate meals brought me to tears. So, I went in *again* today, had my bite re-adjusted, and he re-did two fillings. My dentist was super nice about the whole thing, and the two followup visits I didn't have to pay anything, even though this last one- this morning, in fact- one of the fillings he re-did wasn't even one he did in the first place. So, I'm thinking positive thoughts and popping lots of ibuprofen. In the meantime, I'm starving. But I'm not quite ready to chance eating yet, so instead I think I'll take a nap.

Other than my teeth, everything has been awesome. I've been hanging out with friends and family, sorting through my apartment, and tomorrow I start my 4 day training for the Census job. It gets to come with me to Colorado, so I'm excited I have a job before I even get there. I'm also interested to meet the other people at training. After my experience with the test and the interview let's just say I'm expecting some interesting people.

Ok, goodnight. My teeth are starting to wake up from the shots and I want to be asleep when they do.